Allow the patrons to exit first

I hate the subway, and i have to take it twice every day.
I hate how dirty it is, and i hate how terrifying it is to stand on the edge of the platform.

"Hey guys, do you ever get the feeling when a person stands on the edge of the platform, you just want to push them?"
-Katie

It's people like her that make me scared of my daily commute.

Today there was a man on the bus who seemed normal at first. He started talking to the woman next to me about his journeys in alaska and his dogs. He was really interesting, and gave me a few words of wisdom as well:
"You are a fellopian. Never forget it. You, in fact, are fluent in fellopian, and i'm amazed that you can understand me right now. I wonder how the first fellopian knew he was a fellopian? I wonder what his name was?"
and i realized that strange people on the subway are usually the most entertaining.

We like to yell "I LOVE THE SUBWAY" really loud, especially in crowded places. In this case, we ARE the weird people.

There was another man on the subway last year who talked to us about his immigration to canada and how his sister had to stay in iran; he was also quite interesting.

However, most people on the subway are not strange, and plenty are annoying as shit.
They sit far away from you, they push and shove you, they don't allow the patrons to exit first. They get mad when you leave your metro newspaper on the seat.
They might even yell at you for getting too close to them. What do they expect from the subway?
Either they don't care enough about you or they care a little too much.

Once i dragged my finger along the side of the escalator and by the time i got to the top my finger was black. Ew.

So, the TTC increased its prices. No longer can i hand the operator a five dollar bill to pay for my weekly tickets, but now i have to give them two extra quarters. They also decided to close off the stairway to people who want to transfer to the green line. UGH.

i HATE the subway.
However, i've learned to love the metro newspaper with its lame comics and scarily accurate horoscopes, and i always look forward to smelling the cinnabon in eglinton station.
The subway is actually a very convenient way to travel, and like my grandparents say i am very lucky that i don't have to walk to school. lol.

Next time you're on the subway, do something weird and watch people's reactions. Pretend to take a call in the middle of a tunnel. Take pictures of the floor and watch everyone's head whip around when they think maybe you've taken a picture of them. And remember, always offer your seat to an old person!

love,
baby walrus