"would you judge me if i took a bath?" -Jordan Hill
"IT'S NOT RAPE IF YOU YELL SURPRISE" -Jordan Hill
"paint me purple and call me barney" -Charlie
"i know she's my cousin, i know she's my cousin... but i'm in LOVE with her!" -my cousin
"i guess we'll just agree that you're wrong." - Dad
"if he had more chin, he'd be an augustin 2.0" -Hailey Scott
"the only thing i hate more than babies is..." -Me
"if you swallow a coconut, you trust your asshole." -Foucaut Tachon
"you're drawing clocks! it's not brain surgery!" -Señor Ouellette
"that girl looks like the fat black girl from glee. well, maybe that's just 'cause she's fat. and black." -Lauren Kim
"huh. i guess my echo is broken." -Buford
"it's not annoying when people on tv say things. they're not interrupting. when you're repetitive and speak over me, that's annoying." "so you're saying that you're only perfect when you're on tv?" "uhh... sure, claire." "that's kinda racist." - conversation between my sister and i
"oprah winfrey's pussy has never been more afraid" -George Radner
"she had a penis? well, i guess she could tape a picture to it. something more interesting than a vagina, like a clown or a vagina that talks. so when people ask 'is that a penis?' she could say 'oh, no, it's a talking clown vagina.' it's better than a penis!" -Dad
"what is he, the seahorse captain? what is this, a seahorse, seashell party? well, why didn't i get invited? seahorse. sea hell!"
-Drinking out of cups
"i swear to god that kid said uterus."
"he wants to have alien sex!"
"the room would glow WITHOUT the black light..."
"I can't believe it! You defeated evil... while dancing! Curse you, perry the platypus." -Doofenshmirtz
